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What I Want My Girls to Know About Biblical Friendships

There is no such thing as a perfect friendship. Where there is deep love, there are always deep emotions formed from that said love. This is why "they" say having girlfriends is impossible. It doesn't have to be if you stand on this one principle alone. Whether it's two friends or twenty, L O V E your tribe by walking in truth with all you've got. Even when it's hard. Even when it's uncomfortable. Even when it gets messy. Even when you're wrong (and you need to make it right). Even when they are wrong.
Trust and loyalty is often irreplaceable. That's what I love most about my T R I B E. Those longest lasting friendships, 20 and 30 years, are based on trust and loyalty. To my college loves, college bled into the season of working life, seasons of weddings, seasons of motherhood, difficult adult-life seasons, celebratory seasons and we stood firm with trust. Same can be said for my best friends from high school and my new tribe of friends that having children brought me.  If you want long lasting friends, they need to be built on a solid foundation of love, trust, and loyalty and the frame should consist of humility, selflessness and compassion.  We can't always be the perfect friend, woman, sister, wife, mother, etc, and we will fail, but may we always, always, always, do our best to be a woman who lifts up other women.   
When we take a look back at biblical friendships, we don't see easy or surface level.  We see friendships like the one between Naomi and Ruth that took courage and that models faithfulness.  Ruth was loyal to Naomi no matter how tough it got to remain by her side. We see selflessness, putting protecting another over oneself in Jonathon and David's friendship.  We see Paul in his witness to his friends, proclaiming and encouraging the gospel of Jesus, but also being bold in telling them when they stumbled, holding them accountable while granting so much grace to them.
We are also introduced to many unbiblical friendships such as Judas and Jesus.  Judas followed him and claimed to be His friend, but all the while, he was a fake who would ultimately deny and betray Jesus.  Ahithophel, the type of friend sho repays good for evil, spreading rumors to hinder the success of King David, his supposed friend.
With more or more social media, smart devices, etc, our society is beginning to lose depth in so many relationships.  We appear as best of best friends on the surface, but deep down, when push comes to shove, these best friends are unable to speak real truth to one another.  When things get hard, we run because friendships are supposed to be so easy.  Yes, the easy times should far outweigh the difficult, but when the difficult times to come, those who speak truth are those who hold strong.
As Christian mamas, we need to raise up and lead a generation of Naomi and Ruth's.   Our friendships should be depth filled and positive.  Ones that bring out the best in us and lay to rest anything else.  When the tough gets going, we need to build up one another and focus on speaking the truth in love.  Gentle, humble, compassionate, grace-filled love.  We will make so many mistakes as friends, but true friendships are filled with apologies and forgiveness.  The best way to lead a generation of good friends, is to model being a good friend to our daughters.
A society of Proverbs 17 mamas and daughters can change the world.

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